Rhythm vs Balance

The sermon from Sunday was SO on point with where we are as a family. For a long, long time I feel like we’ve been struggling to find balance in our weekly schedule. It has been a struggle to say the least. The first line of my notes from Sunday read:

Balance is a myth - Rhythm is where it's at.

Not the exact words, but pretty much how I interpreted it.

It was freeing to write down. I’m not sure that we’ll ever find balance…but rhythm? Rhythm is something we can work with!

Rhythm allows the ebb and flow of the season. Similar to a musical ensemble gets together to jam – the rhythm and speed change based on where the muscians feel like it should go. Together they sway, making the music flow – never the same, but always in sync. This is how life has become for us. The seasons call for different speeds, different movement. Sometimes it’s chaotic and sometimes it’s not, but we are in sync (for the most part!) constantly striving to do what’s best for our family.

The sermon was truly about the Sabbath and taking time to actually have one…not because we are required too, but because we should – it’s what God called for in the Old Testament and what the disciples and a policy the early church followed. The full sermon is here and worth the listen, but for me, the takeaway – the tiny nugget I embraced was to be comforted in not find balance…work vs family life is hard…finding a rhythm can make all the difference in the world…

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Dreams

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Today was a day…a crazy day. When I awoke this morning I had a feeling it was going to be rough, but I didn’t anticipate HOW rough…but in the midst of the roughness I got to sit with a friend and share my son’s dream of being in the NFL…and his entrepreneurial genius.

Yes, I used the word “genius.”

My precious boy is all about the mighty dollar. He doesn’t expect it to grow on trees…he expects to earn it. By selling things. And he knows how the market works.

At 6 he was selling rocks…If you were a kid, the rock was $5; but if you were lucky enough to have a mom or grandma GIVE you money to purchase the rock? Well then it was $8.

Earlier this year his school had a book fair. My son wrote a book and wanted to sell it at the book fair in all of it’s stapled together goodness. A rip on one of the pages? No worries – that created an UPCHARGE. Yes…books with ripped pages were MORE expensive. I think we say it’s been aged? It’s an antique?

He also gave out Pet Sitting notices to our neighbors when he read a book about Clifford’s pet sitting business (he also expected ALL of the animals to stay at our house like they did with Clifford)…and then there was the baseball card stand in our front yard…which he marketed to his friends…

My sweet boy has AMBITION and I am going to do everything in my power to embrace these gifts he is showing at an early age and to help them to grow. He wants to be in the NFL…I’ve become friends with men who can shed life on that type of career (and have agreed to sit with him and talk about it!)…He wants to publish a book? We talked about meeting authors and researching self publishing…and the issues of copyright (his first book is about the most recent Superbowl – umm “Big Game”).

I never want my kids to feel like their dreams aren’t attainable – but I do want them to know what goes into making those dreams happen – even at the young ages of 6 and 8. Lincoln asked what my dream was when I was his age and I was able to quickly answer – be an author. Just like I wrote about last night, the dream is still in my heart, but on pause for another time. The exciting part is seeing the same things that drove me as a child inside of Lincoln – his love for reading, his love for writing…and within Kellen – his love to serve and to cook!

It’s so important to embrace our children’s gifts and talents as we begin to discover them. I told Lincoln I want to expose him to ALL the opportunities within his chosen field – regardless of the field. I reminded him that we are not promised tomorrow – nothing is set in stone. His dream of becoming an NFL player could be sidelined due to injury or something unexpected like a car accident (Lincoln kindly reminded me of Brett Favre’s story…something about him being in a car accident and STILL making it to the NFL)…but while we wait to see how his story unfolds, I told Lincoln the only expectation I had of him was to execute what he learns. If my friend tells him to do 100 football drills each day, then he needs to work towards that…and as his mom, I will help him however I can to learn and grow and execute the things he needs to execute (that seems to be my buzz word today!)

I LOVE helping people accomplish their goals. I love creating the plan to make it to happen. The same friend I shared Lincoln’s dream with, I also gave ideas for HIS daughter, who is becoming her own entrepreneur. I literally get high on helping…which is good…because I don’t do drugs:)

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Purpose

What is my

Purpose – it flies around my head ALL THE TIME. What is my purpose? What am I doing with my life? Am I succeeding? Failing? Where I thought I’d be at 36?

It’s been bouncing around my head – probably because I just had a birthday. I typically reminisce about life around my birthday…makes sense because I was one of those kids that pretty much figured I’d set goals and see them through – book published by 20…25…30…surely 35…ahh…not so much. I did do that screenplay thing…once…and it didn’t go too far – I mean to the agent, but let’s be real – she didn’t read it – really – I have the email to prove it!

I was stressing over an event I’m overseeing this weekend. It’s been a slow process and lots of bumps along the way – it’ll go just fine, but as I was stressing over it today I had a friend text me to let me know that her husband’s stemcell transplant will be next week. I stopped what I was doing, looked up at my co-worker and then pointed at my phone. “This is a reality check,” I said, “While I’m stressing over the amount of ice to buy…my friend is prepping her husband for a stemcell treatment.”

Ecuador’s recovering from an earthquake…and getting a zillion aftershocks. My husband’s dealing with pain on a daily basis due to his back. My son is learning that behavior has consequences…and mom’s remembering that follow-thru stinks – but is necessary.

I thought I’d be writing books full-time by now…It’s the way Tim used to introduce me – “This is my wife, Courtney. She’s in school full-time, but eventually she’ll write books.” The goal got lost along the way. A friend once told me that our desires and dreams don’t disappear…sometimes they are put on pause until the timing is better. Timing is God’s right? My focus shifts all the time. Back to the paralysis analysis and so many ideas…not enough time.

At the end of the day, the one thing I come back to time and time again is that I want to make sure my husband and kids know they are loved and are enjoying life. I may not be doing what I thought I’d be doing at 36, but I’m a work in progress, right? God has me where He wants me – constantly striving to be doing better – becoming more and more like Him. It’s not an easy process nor is it one that I excel at, but it’s one I take on – constantly seeing what I can do better, different, how I can be more impactful, more loving. I fail a lot…I speak when I should be silent. I talk when I should listen. Heck – I cut-off people when I am SURE I know what they’re going to say…obviously, I need to work on being silent…At the same time I’ve been paying more attention to our health, to the amount of THINGS we have in our house and how we can reduce them.

We are blessed beyond measure. I am grateful for that. I pray that during the crazy days, where I am questioning my purpose and reason for being in the random state that I call “life right now,” I remember that we are all dealing with stuff. It’s my purpose right now – living life, being the example for my kids…figuring out what the future holds…I’m a month into life as a 36 year old…and though all of my dreams and goals have not been met yet, I’m willing to set them aside to see how life continues to progress:)

Oh, and lift up a prayer for my sweet friend, her husband, children and grandchildren. They are walking a difficult road and the months ahead are uncertain. Pray for peace, strength and love as they prepare for a stemcell transplant and the recovery process. There can never be enough prayer covering and I appreciate all that you can provide!

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April

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April has come out of nowhere. We have been battling freezing temps well into March and now that April has sprung the warm weather is popping…which means the craziness has gotten crazier…All the brilliant plans for my blog and other fun projects have hit the wall. Full stop. I’ve been listening to podcasts galore on social media, business, personal development, etc. and I’m finding that both in business, my personal life and all the side projects I’m getting stuck in the analysis paralysis. I’m basically overwhelming myself in the what-ifs and future possibilities that I’m getting stuck in the what-I-need-to-do-right-nows. Last week I took time to sort out my office and portions of the house (seeing the floor in the playroom is a good thing…but the rest of the house is a work in progress!). I planted some herbs and SHOCKER they are actually sprouting – there’s hope for me yet in the green thumb department!

Sports are back – Tim’s coaching for the first time ever and his team is fantastic – I say this not because the kids are AMAZING (I mean, of course they are!) but more because I’ve been tied up at work and with Kellen’s soccer so I have not been able to be the sidekick as much as I’d like – instead the other parents have rallied…Not sure if this is normal, but on most of the other teams we’ve been on there are pretty much the coach and the asst coach running things…so to see so many of the parents stepping up has been really great. I asked Tim about a snack list – one of the teammates grandparents had taken it on; asked about uniforms – we received them and someone said they’d put the kids names on them, someone else was working on the hats…etc. I love seeing community work together – no matter

They lost their first game but not by much and it’s fun to see he and Lincoln team up. Kell’s back at soccer and still enjoying it. A little girl in his class is on an opposing team and EVERYTIME they see each other they run up and give each other a hug. This started in the middle of one of their games so it was unexpected and hilarious – they hi-fived when each of their teams scored. At one point a coach gently reminded them that they didn’t really need to lift each other off the ground when they hugged each other – to which Kellen responded with, “She’s in my class at school!”

I’ve been doing a lot of investigating in health and nutrition along with business. I’ve found some great movies and books that share some thought-provoking ideas and statements. I’m learning more and more why my superfood shake works the way it does as well as how I can better incorporate a healthier lifestyle within the house. I’m still figuring things out…the biggest issue right now is trying to find  a good work/life balance. The commute is a lot right now, especially balancing it with the new sports schedules and upcoming summer plans, but I’m prepared to work harder to make everything work. Spending a little more time sacrificing fun things in order to put more time into building a life by design – a life that makes sense for us. Everything’s a work in progress, but that’s life, right?

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